We all have some stored pain from our past. You think that it is an integral part of you as a person but it is not it is just a memory.
Memory is just an imagination of what you think had happen. So it cannot be that accurate. You have to understand that situations have different interpretations you will see some things as you see them but not as they really are.
But for other person they have totally other outlook for it. So what we think is real and is not real is just our interpretation of the truth. It is not truth itself.
Getting upset and feeling sorry for you is not a way to go. You have to understand that what happen in past is past.
You cannot change it. You can only live with it. You have to leave you past in past. You have focused all you metal energy on the present movement.
Because thinking about past and feeling bad will not help you in anyway all you can do is live right now.
Think for a minute that we always have now but we try to live in future and past. In this process we destroy our now and total lost the only time we have.
You will only live in this present movement you cannot live a life of past or even future. Both of things are just your imaginations.
So focus you energy on now you can do that by being present in this movement all the time. Do everything with you total presence involves all your senses in you experience in it. Be fully present.
You have to understand one thing in life that pain is inevitable. You will have pain in life it will not matter how much or little money you have. It will not matter if you are a good person or a bad person. All that does not matter at all.
You will have pain in life deal with it. There is no way you can get around it. So you have to be OK with it. Yes you have to make peace with the fact that no matter what you do you will have pain in your life.
After you have done that the next step is finding out how can have happiness in your life if you know that for sure you will have pain it. The only way you can do it is by living through it all. What I mean by that is simple do judge your life is bad or good comparison to others.
But live it all without trying to escape anything that life throw at you. It does not mean that you should do stupid things that you know will harm you. But what it means is simple do the best you can and leave the rest. You will have everything in life success, failure a period of felling stuck. Just be present to experience it all. Do not try to control everything you will fain. Just live.